multi-hyphenated-me

the hyphens that define my life

Bi-cycle! Bi-cycle! Bi-cycle! September 19, 2013

I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride my bike
I want to ride my bicycle
I want to ride it where I like

~Queen, Bicycle Race

My super stealth new bike is AWESOME!

Maybe it isn’t so stealth or super or new, but I do have a bike to peddle around town.  Last weekend, we bought this vintage three speed, wicker basket included, through Craigslist and managed to meet a cool couple in the process.  We dropped the bike at the bike shop for a tune up and new tubes and picked it up this morning, shiny and new to me.

I am giddy.  I want a mountain bike (a basic model like the one my husband sold at our “we’re moving” garage sale) to take on the awesome trails around Spokane, and/or I want a road bike, to compete in at least one more sprint triathlon and to ride the Centennial Trail through Washington and Idaho.  For now, my Sears Robuck, 70’s model, brown 3-speed with boss orange and yellow stripes will take me where I need to go.

My first ride was at lunch today.  I went at midday mainly because it was 45 degrees (F) at 6 AM when I could have gone instead.  No thanks chilly weather, I’ll wait until the day warms.  I set out for the library branch that is nine-tenths of a mile from our house.  From there, I headed to the grocery store and picked up a couple of things I needed for dinner.  Within 31 minutes, I rode 3.6 miles roundtrip and burned 257 calories (thank you Endomondo App). AND I managed to run two errands while getting some exercise.  That’s efficient multi-tasking right there my friends.

I would love to tell you that my ride was smooth and the bike is flawless.  No.  Like me, the bike is aging quickly.  I only found two of the three gears and though I was shifting, the gears changed when they were good and ready.  No worries, I understand.  My spiffy new basket was great empty and performed well with four library books.  However, when I added a bag of groceries it started squeaking like a mouse.  Eek, eek, eek, eek, eek, the entire mile and a half home.

Spokane roads are rough and rugged.  Locals will tell you that all the state money goes to Seattle so our roads get little to no attention.  Local legend also claims that studded tires that people use all winter tear up the roads.  I don’t know about funding, but studded tires are not the issue.  Freeze and thaw yourself time after time and you’d buckle eventually too.   The roads in a car feel bumpy.  On a bike, let me just inform you that I stood up a good portion of my ride.  The bike does sport a very comfy fat ass seat for which I am thankful.

My boys told me that it looked like a Mary Poppins bike.  Wrong, Mary Poppins had a carpet bag. My friend asked me “Where’s Toto?” I can only assume she was calling me old spinster Miss Gulch.  Hmph!  I love my bicycle and really don’t care if I look like Mary Poppins or Miss Gulch or Kermit the Frog or even worse.  My boys won’t laugh when I can outride them on their bmx bikes. My gears will kick in eventually.

Bicycling around my local neighborhood has me super excited, if you haven’t noticed.  I can’t wait for my next ride.

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Open House September 17, 2013

Filed under: Life — multihyphenatedme @ 8:55 pm
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School has been in session all of 12 days, time to have Open House at the elementary school.

We were excited to sit in the classrooms and learn about Spokane Public Schools.

Our 3rd grader has struck a chord with his teacher, and she loves him already.  Thankfully she has a soft spot for squirrelly boys and appreciates his charm and energy.  His class consists of 23 kids, a fourth fewer students than his 2nd grade class.  This can only be good.

Our 4th grader is in a 3rd/4th combination class.  When I first learned that he, our most diligent student, was in a combo, I nearly lost my mind.  I marched to the school office and said, “No way, no how.”  That weekend, at a block party the weekend before school started, I met two moms with 4th graders in the same class.  They told me the teacher was a dynamo and rest-assured that she will challenge my son and there will be nothing lost on his 4th grade experience.  “Uh-huh, ok, let’s see.”  The first day of school, I poured out my heart to this lovely teacher explaining that school is the one place my middle child gets to be himself and shine.  I didn’t want my 4th grader to share a 3rd grade experience.  She listened and appreciated my concern, told me “he will do just fine” and sent me on my way.

Sigh.  I was concerned.  Then, as time passed, information came home, and then sitting through the class presentation tonight, I am on board with the combo class and this incredible teacher.  My kids have been in combo classes before and I don’t mind them typically, since I’ve known the teachers.  Coming in blind, I was neurotic.

The 3/4 combo has 25 kids, again, a fourth fewer than his prior class.  What an amazing difference in what a teacher can accomplish with 8 less kids!

The biggest noticeable differences from California to Washington schools are that music and art are separate classes.  Fine arts lives in the northwest!!  My 3rd grader proclaimed he was a singer and sings, out loud, every day.  He does manage to carry a tune fairly well too!

The boys were first shocked that the cafeteria was indoors – and in the basement – not outside, not realizing that serious weather is on the way.  One thing both boys love about their new school is the gymnasium complete with a rock climbing wall. Their all-time favorite difference between their old and new schools is the school hours.  In California, the kids went to school from 7:45 AM – 2:15 PM with early release at 1:15 on Wednesdays.  In Spokane, school hours are 9:00 AM – 3 PM with late start at 9:30 on Thursdays.  I love the school hours too!  No more early morning battles to get out of bed.  They are hoping for snow days in addition to what is built into the calendar, little do they know that they make up those days in the summer.

We are thrilled with the boys school, teachers and classrooms.  Hurray!

Next week we have middle school open house.  From what I’ve seen already, and our 7th graders reports, our school research prior to our move has really paid off well.  WHEW!

 

Another Day, Another Adventure September 16, 2013

Filed under: Life — multihyphenatedme @ 8:56 pm

No posts for a few days, you may have noticed or perhaps not. I have been slowed with a cold.

Sunday night I felt better but then this incredible wind storm kicked up (40-60 mph winds – so say my neighbors, unconfirmed but I believe it) and the congestion returned thanks to the dust that infiltrated my house before I could run around closing all the windows.   There was thunder but not enough rain to wash away all of the dust.  A rough night’s sleep at best.

In spite of the dust and tossing and turning, I woke up this morning feeling great.  So great in fact, that I decided to go for a walk around the neighborhood and see if there was any storm damage before the kids had to wake up for school.

With the exception of a whole heck of a lot of pine needles, twigs and leaves not much was disturbed until I neared Manito Park, about three-quarters of a mile away from my house.  As I walked down Manito Blvd, where there is a high concentration of trees, I spotted what turned out to be the biggest damage in my two-mile walk.

tree down view 1 

tree down view 2

What the photo doesn’t show is that if the tree fell less than eight feet to the left, instead of falling to the right, the tree would have smashed into the house.  Yikes!

greenbelt

Big broken branches were strewn up and down the green belt en route to the park.  

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A huge branch blocked the path on busy Grand Avenue too.

A lot of action within a two-mile radius of my front door.  Just when I thought I had seen quite a bit, I was reminded that I’m new in town and there is always something incredible waiting for you just around the corner in Spokane. 

whole flock turkey crossing road lone turkey

Turkeys cruising through the neighborhood.  There were at least 15 turkeys, almost a whole rafter!  Go ahead and think I’m smart, I googled it…a group of turkeys is called a rafter.  A single rafter consists of approximately 20 turkeys. Now we’re all in the know.  Admittedly, I was kinda scared.  I was outnumbered.  The turkeys were not shy either, they did not race away as I continued on my path.  Vince said I should have tried to grab one.  I said I was scared, not stupid.

My neighbors have chickens, so I thought that because they weren’t afraid of me, perhaps the turkeys were someone’s farm animal.  My neighbor informed me that they are wild turkeys.  Wild animals have been known to invade our neighborhood.  Where do they possibly come from?  Two or three miles southwest of our house is a bluff or ridge.  The animals come up over the ridge and end up in our neighborhood.  I am still confused about the two to three miles that they roamed in the middle.  My neighbor said an adolescent bull moose once found its way to our street! 

WHAT?!?  Hold the phone.  I live three miles to the heart of downtown Spokane, in a very residential neighborhood, and there is potential to have a MOOSE in my yard?  Maybe I should start baking…in case I need to give a moose a muffin.

Books and baking are always the answer.

 

Be Well September 10, 2013

Filed under: Life — multihyphenatedme @ 8:52 pm
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This is not a post to tell you to eat and drink less and work out more, though this advice is good and most likely we all should follow it (ok fine, just me), this post is dedicated to the importance of well-being.

So far, September has proven to be one hell of an unhealthy month. 

My two sisters were scheduled for a bone marrow transplant – one to give, one to receive, later this month.  We learned this week that my sister in need of the transplant has an issue that conflicts with bone marrow transplant protocol and needs to be addressed by her team of doctors before moving forward with the transplant. Hopefully her doctors figure out a solution sooner than later.

My dad, who is in a nursing home due to a severe stroke, was diagnosed with malignant tumor in his lung.  He had surgery last week to remove the tumor and a quadrant of his lung.  The cancer had not spread to his lymph nodes and he is recovering well.

My nephew’s girlfriend is having back surgery this week to relieve her chronic pain.

My friend’s sister is having a heart transplant on Thursday after a lifetime of heart health issues.

A friend is in the hospital recovering from four broken vertebrae in his neck.

I learned today that a dear co-worker and old friend had a heart attack and is recovering from bypass surgery.

While my thoughts are with those that are in need of care and aid and healing, wishing them all the best in their recovery process, my heart and the message of this post really goes out to those that are the primary caregivers to these patients in need.

 Are you one of those people?  Are you an EMS or first on the scene response person?  Are you a doctor or a nurse?  Or are you a loved one? Or are you just associated with one of these caregivers?

In any of the above cases, your health, your strength – both mentally and physically – are needed like never before.  Your turn to breakdown will come, but, for now, do what you have to do, lean on others if necessary for support but stay strong, have compassion, and do everything you can.Moms naturally fall into this vicious cycle.  We stay up late, getting coughed on or barfed on as we hold our kids close, nursing them through their ailments, pushing ourselves to the limit until the family is outside playing in the sun all happy healthy and well, and we find our maternal selves laid up in bed with an exponential version of their disease.

People also have a tendency to take on others ailments.  My son pulled his left IT band and tweaked his patella tendon on his left leg.  We have been icing and working that leg for a week.  As I see his bum leg getting stronger, I swear his heebie jeebies jumped into my knee. 

Colds, flu and soccer injuries don’t compare to the extreme health emergencies like the those listed above in just my family and friend circle this month.  For the longterm caregivers, know that recovery is going to take a long time.  Care will be arduous and will suck the life out of you if you let it.  There is no sugar-coating it, caring for someone in these extreme cases is hard work.

You must be strong.  You must be healthy.  You must be well, in mind, body and spirit.

What does that mean?  That is for you to decide.  Take time for yourself, get enough sleep, enlist the help of others (this is what family and friends are for), and call on social services for relief.  Whatever you do, don’t carry the responsibility on your shoulders alone, don’t internalize the stress that will create resentment toward the person you’re caring for and love and most importantly, remind yourself why you love the person you are caring for and express that love for them. 

I lack official qualifications to say any of this to you, but I do know from firsthand experience.

 

Shrub Emergency September 8, 2013

On today’s project list was to plant eight boxwood hedges to continue the row across the front perimeter of our yard that inexplicably stopped at the halfway point of our yard.  Nearly completed, hedges in a row.

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All was well for shrubs one through seven.  Then as the shovel entered the ground for shrub number eight, we heard a  HISSSSSSSSS and knew immediately that we hit a gas line.  Vince shouted for me to call 911.  Within 10 minutes, the emergency call was placed and the Spokane Fire responded, with six trucks.  SIX!

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The first two rolled up and blocked traffic.

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Three more blocked traffic coming from the main arterial road.

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The chief showed up.

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Along with Spokane Rescue.

We were evacuated along with our neighbors to the east and west.  We sat on the curb across the street watching the action.

We were stunned that we hit a gas line at such a shallow depth.  My husband, with 25 years construction experience, commented that gas lines are typically sheathed in PVC, not a bare, exposed polyurethane pipe.  Or, if the pipe is exposed, then there is an indicator, like sand, concrete, tape or other notification, that the gas or electrical lines are near.  Apparently in Washington there is a LAW that says you have to call the utility company if you are going to dig to even plant a daisy to avoid hitting a line.  Here’s the thing about laws, you sometimes don’t know you’re doing wrong until you get caught breaking the law, or the gas main as in our case today.

As new citizens of Spokane, how are we supposed to know shallow lines are the norm?  How are we supposed to know to call the utility company before digging a foot down before planting a shrub?  Though ignorance is no excuse, we simply did not know; furthermore, from our experience in living in both California and Arizona, we have never been required to call for landscaping.  For serious excavation, yes, for landscaping, no.  Lesson learned.

We sat on the curb chatting up our neighbors, informing nosey passerbys what was going on and waiting.  Then….

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the local news showed up!  Vince and the neighbors quickly volunteered me for the speaking role.  Damn!  I was gardening, I didn’t even have lip gloss handy. I really wished I was wearing my teenage daughter’s “oops” sweatshirt! Thankfully they just wanted photos, no interview of the dummy that didn’t know to call.

After 20-30 minutes of us and the fire department standing around, Avista, the utility company, arrived to save the day. Within moments, the line was clamped, turns out just to be a nick in the line from the shovel tip, and we were permitted to return to our houses.

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The guy in the yellow super safety suit is the utility man in the danger zone clamping the line.

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The fire department took a tour of our house checking the gas line for leakage as gas typically travels up the line.  Thankfully, no gas was detected and the house was our again.  I wanted badly to ask for a selfie photo with the firemen but lost my nerve.  The firemen and utility man were all great and kept everyone safe.  The best part, nobody once called us a bunch of dumbasses, which we appreciated.  Funny thing, the firemen told us this was their second call, just like ours, today.  Many of our neighbors came up to us afterward and told us similar stories or their misadventures with buried gas lines.  We are in good company.

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This is an interesting photo, my last of the experience.  Our sprinkler line lies horizontal with the sidewalk.  The gas line, newly fixed, starts at an 18″ depth at the sidewalk, then quickly jumps to a 12″ depth.  Why did they change elevation when the line was installed?  Why didn’t they stay deep?

Huge thanks to Spokane Fire and Rescue for keeping us and our neighbors safe today.  Thanks to the Avista utility man for not only clamping and fixing the line but for lighting the pilot light in my second oven that has been out since we moved in.  He taught us the trick to lighting it (heating the coupler, pushing a button, something something…I hope Vince paid attention).

Boxwood hedge #8 doesn’t have a home in the front row but the hedgerow project itself is done.

Another first for us in Spokane. Broken gas line, check!  Emergency services, check!  Let’s hope this mis-adventure was our last.  Good to know the emergency teams are in place, ready when we need them.

 

Sweet Sixteen September 6, 2013

A friend of mine posted on her blog, livefullyalive, today that there are sixteen weeks left in the year. Sixteen short weeks, one hundred and twelve days until 2013 is over. 

“That’s it!?!’  Was my first reaction. I’m already stymied by this short week due to the Labor Day holiday, beaten down with back-to-school week and now this newsflash. Not that, on September 6, December 31 seems far away.  Click through the upcoming holidays and the end is obviously near.

A long time ago, I attended a conference that had a slogan, Mo Chi Chu, translation:  moving straight ahead without hesitation.  Life is very easy to spend hunched over like a linebacker pushing through until week 16 is upon us, barreling through what comes our way to meet our goals or reach our destination.

My husband and I practice living in the moment, staying centered and in the now. We’re an interesting combo because he’s naturally a forward thinking dreamer and I’m nostalgically rooted. Not surprising if you know he is a water sign, constantly swimming upstream, and I’m an earth sign, rooted and  grounded.  Staying present, in the now, can be a challenge for us both regardless of our elements.  As goal and project driven people, we both look at what’s coming up next, as in the next 16 weeks, to see what we can achieve in that time frame as we are inclined to make the most of each day.

Yet our practice of staying in the now, reminds us to slow down, make each moment count, and be grateful for what we have.

Tonight at dinner we congratulated the boys on finishing their first week at their new schools.  We acknowledged that it hasn’t been an easy week but each day the boys each shared a story that included someone else, a friend, a connection. We gave thanks for our health, in spite of our son’s soccer injury this week that has him sidelined at the onset of soccer season, and all of us low on sleep from the recent thunderstorms. This week has definitely left us wounded but has not stopped us. 

Today, I’m grateful that my oldest son is safe.  He was impatient waiting for us to pick him up after school so he decided, with his bum knee and foot, to walk/limp home.  I didn’t see him as I drove to pick him up, couldn’t find him in the parking lot or on campus and was on the verge of panic before my husband called to inform me that our son walked home.  When I got home, he griped at me because I was late.  After telling him I was thankful he was safe, I reminded my son that he has a cell phone, not to talk or text with his friends, but so I can reach him whenever I need to, for whatever reason.  If he is going to walk, call me, as I called him to tell him I was late. 

At that moment, I paused.  I remembered having the same conversation with my daughter, his older sister, when she was in junior high and having the conversation again with my son gave me pause.  I hugged my boy at that moment.  He squirmed.  In that moment, I realized how quickly he will grow up as his sister before him went from junior high to sweet sixteen to college in a blink of an eye. 

With only 16 weeks left in the year, the holidays are soon upon us.  Remember to take each day as it comes and embrace the special moments in our lives.

Thanks LiveFullyAlive for inspiring my post tonight!  I am grateful for you my friend.

 

Fair Eve September 4, 2013

This eve is not fair.  It’s hot and humid with a storm on the way promising relief.

Tonight is Fair Eve, the night before baking entries are due at the Spokane County Fair.  Judging takes place on September 5th & 6th.

Oh yes, it’s ba-king night, and the fee-ling’s right.  Oh yes, it’s baking night, oh what a night. Oh what a night!  I hope you sang along to the classic disco tune Ladies Night, if not read it again.

I have no time to blog, let alone sit down, and shouldn’t be posting this blog right now but, I’m a giver, you want to read, so who am I to stop you?

I can’t tell you what I’m submitting to the fair just yet.  Photos and full details will follow in tomorrow’s post.  I will tell you that I’m submitting six entries. Two are entries in the Fleischmann’s Yeast Best Baking Contest, first category is baked goods and the second category is dessert pizza. Each category has a $125 first prize and momma needs a new pair of shoes. A quick bread, cookies and two pies is all that I’ll tell you about my other entries for now.  I’m in it to win it, but I really just love the motivation to bake.  I’m really anxious to see the competition too. What does Spokane County have to offer?  We’ll just have to see.

I have seen some great fair photos across the country from The Fabulous Beekman Boys from Sharon Springs NY (Josh Kilmer-Purcell and Brent Ridge), known December winners of CBS’s “Amazing Race,” were grand marshals for the Grand Sunshine Fair Parade in Schoharie County.  www.beekman1802.com  I follow them on Facebook and  find them funny and practical and awesome, you might too.

My cousin is a ridiculously talented knitter and took first place for each of her entries, a shawl and tam at the Medina County Fair in Northeast Ohio.  She also took second place for a quart of cherries she canned.  I just want to say that we had the same knitting teacher, our Grandma, yet I own “The Idiot’s Guide to Knitting” and she is a professional knitter, providing samples for knitting magazines to show in books and patterns.  Blood is one thing, talent is another.  I hope she doesn’t mind me bragging her up and showing off her blue ribbons.

kim craigs

My friend’s kids are true 4-H animal raising fair winning professionals.  Her teenage high school daughter took the Grand Champion prize for her steer (Go Taya!) at the Coconino County Fair in Flagstaff, AZ.  Her husband also proudly won the Hogs in Heels Race – envision this guy –  6’3, skinny as a rail, in jeans and heels chasing a full size pig around a corral with a bunch of other men in heels.  If my friend and her husband didn’t have 5 kids, I’d question his real motivation other than good old-fashioned fair fun.  The kids also showed chickens, pigs, goats and steer and have a bunch of really cool giant belt buckles from past year victories to prove they are serious contenders.

One of my co-workers worked at the Orange County Fair in Southern California for three weekends pouring wine samples from the various wines submitted for judging.  He likes to think of himself as a Carney, but he is just one of the important people who make county fairs fun, even if it is the OC Fair which is a county fair on steroids.

Now it’s my turn.  I wasn’t going to blog but just churned out 575 words and counting just reliving the summer fun my connections have had at their county fairs.  I hope you found some summer fun at your county fair.

Back to baking!

 

Drum Roll Please September 1, 2013

In January this year, my new year’s resolution was to post on my blog every day. Today, September 1, is the 244th day of the year. Though I did not live up to my resolution, I am damn proud of the fact that today’s post is my 100th blog post.

Not only did I manage to write 100 posts on my blog, you, my faithful readers, have read my posts!

Thank you to everyone that has taken the time to read my blog! Whether you are one of the night owls reading late at night, or if you start your day reading my blog with your morning coffee, thank you.

Thank you to those of you that follow along and comment about my on my personal Facebook page. You challenge me and inspire me and care about me enough to want to know what happens next, for which I am thankful. Thank you too for missing me when I fail to post because I’m down or exhausted or because I just need a break. Your support comforts me and gives me strength.

For those of you that don’t know me, yet found my blog enticing and interesting enough to follow, you make my heart swell. Fifty-two unknowns follow my little blog start-up that could and does. Follow. Not check in from time to time, follow. That means every time I post, they are notified that Multi-hyphenated-me just posted again to her blog. Thank you for following my blog. I hope my posts continue to be worthy of your time.

Aside from my Facebook commenters, thank you for your comments posted directly to my blog. Please keep posting! It is such a cheap thrill for me to see that someone has commented! Facebook commenters, thank you too, but you don’t affect my stats. One reason I have this blog is to become a better writer, whatever that means and for whatever it is worth, mostly just personal satisfaction. I love stats. Stats tell me how many clicks on each individual post, how many shares and tracks all comments. Facebook friends, please, if you would, follow my blog and post directly to my page. Or not, I just love you and your comments any way I receive them.

Thank you visible readers of my blog. Thank you for clicking “like” on Facebook or on my site. Thank you for your comments. Thanks for supporting my effort to be a writer no matter how ridiculous and asinine my attempts may be.

Before I end this, I want to express gratitude to all of you out there that read my blog but don’t click “like” or leave a comment or follow my site. I think of you as my secret admirers. Thank you for reading and for giving my site your attention. If I have inspired you to read my blog, or you were just bored senseless and chose my blog because your mind has gone numb, I am grateful for your time. Feel free to click “like” or comment or follow me.

Drum roll please….tomorrow will be blog post #101. And the beat goes on.

 

Burp Snart, Excuse Me August 20, 2013

Filed under: Life — multihyphenatedme @ 11:09 pm

In our house, manners are a way of life, you don’t deviate, you constantly practice good manners.  Ok, fine, this may just be in my Dream House, but we at least strive, I, at the very east enforce good manners. Reality, I ride the manners nag horse and the boys just let me ride on by sometimes noticing, sometimes not, depending on the moment. Some days they are on their manners game, mostly not.

I will not be defeated. If I accomplish one thing as a mother, it will be to instill good manners into my children, whether they damn well like it or not.  My husband is indifferent.  Who cares if they chew with their mouth open or say can I? I remind him of this article I read in the LA Times about a mother who didn’t stress manners while raising her son.  The mother didn’t realize her error until she went to dinner with her son and his girlfriend, who later became his wife.  During this dinner, the girlfriend subtly reminded her son to use table manners, motioning to put his napkin on his lap, tapping which utensil to use, tapping her lips so he would chew with his mouth closed.  The mother was horrified but didn’t say anything at the time, realizing her error.  In the comfort of our home, I agree with my husband, who cares.  Our house, however, is the training ground for our children to go out into the world and successfully and independently thrive.  Over and over and over we train.

The picture I paint is not so frightening.  They are good boys, they do mind their manners most days, and they have even wow’d me to tears with perfect manners once when out with their grandmother (yes, I threatened their lives before hand, but still, wow’d to tears); however, they outnumber me 3 to 1 and in no time flat will a perfectly good situation go awry once one of the boys gets another giggling or instigates horseplay. They can not help themselves, rough and tumble puppy play comes naturally, manners do not.

Just so you have an idea of my life, Dale, our 14-year-old black giant beast of a black lab, recently joined in the shenanigans.  While walking through the dining room during dinner with his nylabone in his mouth, saw something outside and barked without dropping his bone.  I reprimanded his manners as I would any of the boys, “Dale, don’t talk with your mouth full.”  The boys laughed and continued the play, barking with their mouths full, at the dinner table, which also got Dale to continue barking with his mouth full.  I’m not always the nag.

The other day, the boys and I were out running errands.  Surrounded by boys, I refuse to open a door, believing that they need to learn to open, and hold the door open (note this is a 2-part task), for women, elderly and others in general. I have a tendency to walk fast and lead the way, usually because they’re dawdling or messing around, which causes me to wait at the door until they show up. Patience is not my strongest suit, I’m typically growling by the time they show up.  While we were out, such occurred and I arrived at the door first.  The boys caught up and then lined up behind me, in age order, as if we were in school.  “Really?” I turned and said to my twelve-year-old.  “What?” he replied, completely clueless.  “The door,” I said as I motioned to the closed door.  “Oh,” he exclaimed before opening the door and held it, not only for us, but for the three other people who lined up behind us, because why, I have no idea.

This week, though, we hit a new high.  We were out to lunch at an upscale restaurant.  The boys were appropriately reminded (read threatened) to exercise their good manners.  We started off well.  The door was opened and held for us and two elderly ladies departing.  Good job. We sat down, they thanked the hostess for their menus and napkins went immediately onto their laps. Wow. They ordered with “May I have” not “Gimme” or “Can I”.  While waiting for our food, no fights or bickering ensued, only pleasant, calm conversation.  Shocker.  Lunch arrived and they politely asked for things they needed and ate their meal without someone going for a long pass for bread or something spilled or feet are on the table or some ungodly behavior that would put me over the edge. No, none of it.

Then it happened.  My nine-year-old dropped a burp snart and then calmly, innocently said, “Excuse me.”

A burp snart is when you consecutively or simultaneously burp, sneeze and fart. 

My nine-year-old burped like a boat’s fog horn (think Homer Simpson), sneezed that sounded as though we were all slimed (we were not, thankfully) and farted so powerfully that he could have been rocket launched through the roof. The room was silenced and heads turned our way.  I reacted and said “Niko!” He, continuing to enjoy his lunch while his brothers were hysterically, whooping with laughter, looked at me, oblivious and said, “What?  I said excuse me.”

Burp Snart 1, Me 0

 

Reduce Your Environmental Impact August 19, 2013

In 2012, my collegiate daughter enrolled in an English class that required her to read No Impact Man by Colin Beavan.  I found the book at the library and read it before handing it over to the actual student.  No Impact Man is chronicles the year-long experiment by Beavan and his family to have zero impact on the planet while living in Manhattan, NY.  This isn’t a story about a homesteader with a bunch of acreage in the middle of nowhere self-sustaining.  The author and his family give up things we take for granted, electricity and travel and only consuming food within a 250 mile radius of your home while living in the largest city in the world.

As a voracious reader, I loved the story for the impact it had on me.  This book made me think about how I can reduce my impact, my carbon footprint on the planet.   Your carbon footprint is the amount of gas emissions created by you and your family through the course of  life.  Of the 100 ways to reduce your carbon footprint on Green Wiki, I’m happy to report we are responsibly taking 50 measures to reduce our carbon footprint.  (This list was obtained from http://green.wikia.com/wiki/How_to_reduce_your_carbon_footprint  check it out)

  1. Buy locally produced goods and services.
  2. Reduce consumption. Reuse items when you can. Recycle your waste.
  3. Make compost.
  4. Use reusable bags for grocery shopping.
  5. Clean the lint filter in your dryer. This will reduce energy consumption as well as electrical and environmental costs.
  6. Rake leaves and shovel snow manually instead of using a leafblower or snowblower.
  7. Only use your dryer, dishwasher and washing machine when you have a full load; don’t do half loads. This reduces the number of loads and energy consumption.
  8. Use a dishwasher rather than washing by hand as the efficient ones use less water.
  9. Whenever possible, hang laundry outside to dry on a clothes line rather than throwing laundry into a dryer.
  10. When you remodel or paint a room, buy the right amount of paint. This reduces chemicals entering the atmosphere from paint production, energy to make the paint, and saves you money.
  11. Eat one less serving of meat a week. Use a cheese-free alternative each week. Cheese is an animal product and has the same carbon cost as meat. Cattle release a great deal of methane into the atmosphere. Consider unendangered fish, beans, and soy as replacements for beef, dairy, and fowl protein.
  12. Plant an organic garden and grow your own vegetables even if it’s just a small patch or a windowsill planter.
  13. Create a wormery. This uses worms in a sealed, hygienic, and non-smelling unit to compost your waste, which can then be used to fertilize your garden.
  14. Fit your garden hose with a trigger sprayer, this will reduce your water consumption.
  15. Stop watering your lawn. Grow a garden instead. Lawns require lawnmowers, which require fuel. Gardens allow you to grow veggies which require less trips to the produce section.
  16. Water your garden in the evening as this will save water.
  17. Use cotton towels and fabric napkins rather than paper ones.
  18. When cooking, don’t overfill saucepans and pots.
  19. Use the top shelf (the hottest shelf) of the oven so food cooks quicker and less energy is consumed.
  20. Use a toaster to toast bread instead of toasting bread under the grill.
  21. When cooking put the lids on your pots and pans to reduce heat loss.
  22. Don’t put hot or warm foods and drinks into your refrigerator.
  23. Use a laptop as opposed to a desktop, as laptops use up to 80% less energy.
  24. Unplug your phone charger when not in use.
  25. Buy secondhand household items and save the C cost of the production of new goods.
  26. Adjust your central heating thermostat down by 1°C (2°F) in winter and up in summer.
  27. Use passive solar heating to capture heat in your home by opening the curtains during the day and closing them at dusk. In summer, close your curtains during the heat of the day. You’ll save 25-75% on your heating and gas bill.
  28. Run ceiling fans instead of using air conditioning. Avoid using air conditioning in your home and car whenever possible. If you live in a hot climate, doing this could save more than one ton of CO2.
  29. Get your boiler serviced regularly to ensure it is working properly and not wasting your money.
  30. Switch off lights in rooms at home when leaving the room.
  31. Use “task” lighting rather than whole room lighting when a small amount of light is required.
  32. Take advantage of natural daylight as much as possible.
  33. Install insulated blinds on windows to crease energy escape.
  34. Only heat rooms in your house that are in use.
  35. Donate or recycle your old clothing to a thrift shop rather than throwing them away.
  36. Defrost your refrigerator; this will ensure that it runs efficiently.
  37. Buy uncertified wood to ensure sustainable forest management.
  38. Take a shower instead of a bath; a shower uses approximately one twentieth of the energy that a bath does.
  39. Filter your own water, rather than buying bottled water. Most tap water is safe to drink, and some bottled waters are flown in from the far corners of the earth and the production process of the bottles adds to greenhouse gas release. Additionally, many find that tap water tastes about the same as bottled water because bottled water is derived from tapwater to begin with.
  40. Adjust your water heater temperature downwards.
  41. Insulate your water heater or water tank with an insulation blanket to save on heat loss.
  42. Use cold water to wash and rinse clothes.
  43. Fix dripping faucets.
  44. Insulate your water pipes.
  45. Turn off the tap while brushing your teeth.
  46. Space and water heating account for over 70% of energy used in the home, so switching to clean, renewable energy (e.g. wood fuel, solar energy or heat pump systems) makes a big reduction in the environmental impact of your home.
  47. Reduce excess baggage and pack lighter when travelling. Planes flying with extra baggage use more fuel.
  48. Telecommute or arrange with your employer to work one day a week from home.
  49. Drive at or below the speed limit as this reduces your vehicles emissions.
  50. Whenever possible only drive during non peak hours.

 This spring, I am ripping up my front lawn and installing our raised bed vegetable garden complete with a worm composting system. Plans are in process and I can hardly wait. Prior to our move (which definitely added to our footprint), I saw a project in Whole Living magazine that creatively used old cotton, collared shirts to make simple fringe-edged napkins. This project gave me the idea to use excess fabric yardage I had stored (every person that sews has a fabric horde somewhere) to make 17″ napkins instead of using paper napkins.  We now have very colorful meals using these napkins. I haven’t bought paper napkins since moving in June.

Being a total paper towel abuser, I decided to take this project a step further and stop buying paper towels.  I went to Ikea and purchased 70 white cotton kitchen towels with red stripe. Seventy is too many I now realize, forty is really the number I use on a weekly rotation.  I have a drawer in my kitchen filled with these towels and use them in place of paper towels.   The excess towels that I purchased are used for cleaning.  I wrote “cleaning” across the bottom of each with a fabric marker. Old habits die-hard, I am still buying paper towels but instead of purchasing the Costco super pack regularly, one roll is lasting weeks. According to the National Resource Defense Council, if every household in the United States replaced just one roll of virgin fiber paper towels (70 sheets) with 100% recycled ones, we could save 544,000 trees.  The NRDC also states that if every household in the United States replaced just one package of virgin fiber napkins (250 count) with 100% recycled ones, we could save 1 million trees. Though my cloth napkin and towel project has increased my laundry, my paper goods costs have dropped dramatically and trees are saved in the process.  That’s good, I like trees.

Use less, use better, use smarter is really the message. Kermit the Frog said, “It ain’t easy being green.”  Actually, Kermie, it is easy to be green, just try.  Take a look at the list and see what you currently do and what you could do better.